guitlouie said:
Yeah, there is absolutely no line anymore that some people will not cross when it comes to marriage talk. Like I said, me and the little lady have been together well over a decade, and we have two kids. We have a very good relationship. It has lasted longer than most of my friends who got married, and I don't see anything coming along anytime soon to break it up. When people find out that we are not married in the technical sense, they almost always flip. Then the questions start. My damn Tax lady was freaking on me just a couple weeks ago. "Yes 'mam, I have two kids, but I am filing as single." "No 'mam, their mother does not claim them." "No 'mam, I'm not divorced." "No 'mam, she didn't die, is this part of the tax form?" "Yes 'mam she lives with us." "Mam, really, can we just get on with it?" "No 'mam, I'm not scared of hell." Freaking H and R Block.
That's crazy. People are so freaking nosy. I wish everyone would just mind their own business. It's not their bedroom, so why should they care? I don't understand. I know a few people who are really nosy about other people's sex lives, and I just think it's weird. I feel like saying "I can make up whatever lie I want to tell you because it's not something you will ever be a part of, and there is no way you would ever know the difference." Crazy weirdos.
It's funny, we had the big gay marriage vote here in CA, and I was thinking "Yes, because we should make sure everyone gets the soul crushing experience of planning a wedding." I think if and when they pass gay marriage here, the headline in the Onion the next day will be "Gays fight for right to divorce."
As far as the insane wedding crap - I had a woman tell me that we had to have a big fancy wedding if we wanted our guests to give us wedding gifts because "the gifts are like paying admission to the wedding and we would be ripping them off". Seriously, wtf? She basically told me that the only reason anyone would come to my wedding would be for the free food, not because anyone likes me or my fiance.
We want to have pie at the wedding instead of cake, and people FLIP the eff out when I tell them that... "What, not even cupcakes?? You have to at least have cupcakes! What if there are people who don't like pie?". I'm constantly getting the "what ifs" from everyone... you know what, what if aliens freaking invade the ceremony? Jesus people, it's just pie! And right from the beginning everyone had a problem with our date because we originally wanted to do it on St. Patrick's Day (anniversary of our first date). "But that's not on a weekend, what if some people have work?"
The absolute worst thing though is going anywhere where my mom's friends or my grandfather's friends will be, because the first thing out of their mouths is "How is the wedding coming along?", and then I have to have an awkward conversation with someone I barely know and have them put in their 2 cents, which is usually not advice that I would ever take, or it's a scolding about how my non-traditional wedding will be inferior to other weddings.
It's like when you're a kid and everywhere you go people ask you what you're learning in school, and you really want to say "Not much, I hate school," but you know if you do, you'll get a big lecture.
Anyways, we're just gonna keep it small and have the ceremony on one day, and have a big party after the honeymoon and after we are all moved in to our new place. That's when we're gonna get the keg of Beamish stout and a keg of Wyder's Pear Cider and have the biggest snake bite toast ever, and have a bbq and play Belle & Sebastian.
I told my craziest party friend that she could plan a bachelorette party for me, and now she is thinking that we should start off with a combination bachelor/bachelorette party planned by her and the best man, which will be a tarts and vicars party and will involve renting the inflatable chapel and using it as a bounce house. I guess enventually the boys and girls will split up for respective clubbing eventually, but doesn't that sound insane? So I guess if the wedding isn't wacky fun, we'll have that to remember.
now drinking the stuff is what I spend most my time doing.
