The Worst Guitar Tone You've Ever Heard

[Wizard of Wailing]

      I heard "Mrs. Brown You've Got a Lovely Daughter" by Herman's Hermits yesterday, and it reminded me how much I've always disliked that thin, super-muted guitar tone in that song.  Anyway, it got me to thinking about the worst guitar tone I've ever heard from a major act (I'm not including local bands featuring a kid who just got his 1st Metal Zone pedal).  Winning by a landslide was Courtney Love with Hole.  I saw them during the Lollapalooza 5 tour stop in Chicago.  She was playing a Mustang on the bridge pickup.  Her amp sounded like the bass and mid were on 0, and the treble was set to 11.  It was about 45 minutes of agony for my ears and all I could think was, "How can she not notice that?"  Luckily Sonic Youth came on after them and made everything okay.

 

[sixstringsamurai]

Pretty much 85% of all the punk / Oi! bands, prior to digital recording, I have ever seen....

I love them all, but to hear them now as an adult knowing what it was supposed to sound like...
Last Resort
The Templars
Op IV
Niblick Henbane
early Cock Sparrer
Pretty much any low budget punk rock from '80-'90

 

[bagman67]

How about yours truly on my first guitar amp, a Fender Squier 15 circa 1985?  Man, did that amp sound like crap with the gain maxed.  In retrospect, I realize there are good sounds to be had out of that amp, and I'm not really responding to the question as you framed it, but I'm kinda embarrassed at how bad my taste and my ear were at that time.  I sat down with another specimen from the same era a couple years ago and with more experience under my belt, I really got some great tones out of that thing.


But to address the question as posed, i.e., tones recorded by alleged professionals, the shrieky-chorused guitar sounds Bob Mould made with Husker Du really chaps my earbones.  Great songs, great energy, but the guitar sounds like a dental drill with emphysema.

 

[erogenousjones17]

Like Bagman, I'd like to humbly submit the younger version of myself. Cheap Jackson JS-something (cheapest of the cheap), Peavey Rage 15 amp, Boss DS-1 Distortion pedal. As the French say, le pew. 

I've honestly never cared for Randy Rhoads' tone, even on classics like "Crazy Train". I know he's an untouchable icon from the pantheon of guitar gods, but...meh.

 

[bagman67]

I've honestly never cared for Randy Rhoads' tone, even on classics like "Crazy Train". I know he's an untouchable icon from the pantheon of guitar gods, but...meh.

No kidding!  It all sounds way too weak and overprocessed for the songs he's supposed to be supporting.  Too bad so much blow and booze was being ingested during those sessions.

 

[alterbridgefan]

Oliver Ackermann's sounds on A Place to Bury Strangers' "Ocean" is pretty bad. Actually, that whole song sucks.

Loads worse out there... Just nothing else springs to mind at the moment.

 

[TonyFlyingSquirrel]

This, by far, especially at 1:50.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmHxYx74MTg

 

[fdesalvo]

Hate to say it, but Steve Lukather's live tone is awful.  Saw him along with a ton of other rock legends in West Hollywood recently.  His tone is 100% scooped mids and gain on 10.  Very thin and piercing.  Very Boss Metalzone.  I hope he wakes up one day and realizes the damage he is doing. 

 

[stubhead]

Oh dear - now you made me do it. I refuse to spend too much time on the subject - I could pull up dozens of hideous piezo-pickup acoustic atrocities - what WAS Takamine thinking? Revenge for Hiroshima, OK YOU WON! Jeez.

But mention of Lukather can only lead to this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g90vLXe_hno

Jan Hammer, Carlos Santana and Jeff BECK - could we, ahem, mention tone? The recording's not so hot, but surely clear enough to hear Lukather using his full 1986-era effects rack to - ahem - "blow" Jeff Beck and Carlos Santana right off... well, no. Beck himself is in full goof mode, but Luke - it dances! - it grins! - it leaps! - there are a few times where Santana and Beck just seem to be trying to get away from Lukather. Yes you're BETTER Steve. 50:14 vs. 51:45 vs. 52:14... AWESOME DUDE! SO fast! Sure! You WIN Steve! NOW SHUT THE fudge UP.

 

[line6man]

How about some seriously awful bass tone?  :icon_jokercolor:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K57w9pdJPnY

I've been in a Jason Becker phase lately, but I have to say, his tone was pretty weak. Still love his playing, however.  :icon_biggrin:

 

[fdesalvo]

Steve Lukather and Slash tied for first when I saw then a few months ago.  Sounds like both were playing on MT-2s with scooped mids.

 

[stubhead]

This is actually a totally cool subject, in a constructive way! Huh? ....because you have to learn what NOT to do, SO YOU CAN AVOID IT too!... and there's actually a whole lot more of THAT in your life than good tone ( for a while at least - good dog, some of those high school "jams"... )

While there is enormous amounts of early clutz-tone, I'd amend the question (just for me now) to "the worse tone you ever heard out of a 'professional' band" - vintage Black Oak Arkansas live gets the silver star, but the clear gold metal winner is:

BIG BROTHER AND THE HOLDING COMPANY!

The problem was, Janis Joplin was SO great it's kinda impossible to not hear, and like HER... but crusty dookie, it's NO WONDER she sang the blues, having to listen to that cacophony every night! When the basics like tuning, and starting and stopping at the same time, go awry, "tone" is usally adrift in a sea of mush. Who wouldn't shoot heroin to get through those kind of nights...

No I won't link to some neither, I've already used my quota of evil for the month.

 

[Ddbltrbl]

While there is enormous amounts of early clutz-tone, I'd amend the question (just for me now) to "the worse tone you ever heard out of a 'professional' band" - vintage Black Oak Arkansas live gets the silver star, but the clear gold metal winner is:

BIG BROTHER AND THE HOLDING COMPANY!

Can't argue with either of those! But, I have to include this gem by Neil Young.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rm8yEN8BU4A
As much as I love the song, I can't help but think that there were better tone choices than this!  :doh:

 

[mayfly]

No I won't link to some neither, I've already used my quota of evil for the month.

Allow me!  Found one without Janis:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ujd0_0K_djk

 

[Cagey]

Allow me!  Found one without Janis:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ujd0_0K_djk

Holy crap!

Y'know, as much as it shames me to say so, I'll admit I've taken my fair share of acid back when I was young and full of enough piss and vinegar to counteract it, but I can't imagine any amount of it making that tune interesting.

 

[mayfly]

Allow me!  Found one without Janis:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ujd0_0K_djk

Holy crap!

Y'know, as much as it shames me to say so, I'll admit I've taken my fair share of acid back when I was young and full of enough piss and vinegar to counteract it, but I can't imagine any amount of it making that tune interesting.

and they put it on TV too!!!

 

[Cagey]

and they put it on TV too!!!

Yeah, well. I can't come up with a retort about the integrity of the mainstream media without getting political and my red participation bars say I have to set a good example, so...  :icon_biggrin:

 

[bagman67]

I kinda have a running beef with the "hippie blooz noodle" tone. Stephen Stills was perhaps the most prominent offender in that category - just aimless pentatonic acid-soaked weedly-wee noises. 




*shudder*

 

[line6man]

No I won't link to some neither, I've already used my quota of evil for the month.

Allow me!  Found one without Janis:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ujd0_0K_djk

You sure that's not one of those parody videos where someone plays bad music over a good track?  :tard:

 

[mayfly]

You haven't seen anything yet.  Check this out:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIVe-rZBcm4