It may seem morbid, but when I die...

David

Junior Member
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188
I decided that I want to be cremated and then have my ashes put in some container and stuck in the control cavity of one of my Warmoth guitars.  It is better than being stuck in the ground or in a vase on the mantle.  It seems like a good way to live on, making music or on display.  I love the idea of one my grandkids rocking on grandpa.

Now I just need to decide what guitar to live on in.  Of course I'll probably need to make one special.  Skull and crossbone inlays on the neck might be too obvious... 
 
Already in my will, my ashes will be scattered over the Autodromo Monza, which is the holy land for me.
 
I like the idea of being scattered somewhere special. Someplace with trees and mountains and water.
 
I told my wife that when I die I want my body thrown through a wood chipper on a plane flying over a high school football game in my home town.  Preferably the home coming game, and preferably they target the home bench.  I think it would be a fitting final statement of my feelings about that place. 

Can you believe she refused?
 
a guy in my home town got sucked through a wood chipper.
he was working for a woman removing a fallen tree and never showed up to get paid, she called the police and they found a boot or some thing in the chipper. i wonder how she felt knowing that he was spread across her lawn in tiny little pieces? i think i'd move if that happened in my yard.
 
Your ashes won't fit in the control cavity; an averaged sized person will yield a tightly packed ash mass about the volume of a 6-pack of 16 oz.(.5 l) beer in cans. Need to plan on what to do with the rest, or build enough rear routes to hold all that.
 
chuck7 said:
I told my wife that when I die I want my body thrown through a wood chipper on a plane flying over a high school football game in my home town.  Preferably the home coming game, and preferably they target the home bench.  I think it would be a fitting final statement of my feelings about that place. 

Can you believe she refused?

Oh, man... This is the funniest thing I've read in years!!!

I'm sitting in my cube, tears in my eyes, about to have an anurism trying to keep from laughing.

I gotta put that in my will or something.

JBD
 
jackthehack said:
Your ashes won't fit in the control cavity; an averaged sized person will yield a tightly packed ash mass about the volume of a 6-pack of 16 oz.(.5 l) beer in cans. Need to plan on what to do with the rest, or build enough rear routes to hold all that.

Just get the "hollow" option for your custom-made Warmoth burial body.  I'm sure Warmoth would be happy to entomb your ashes in the cavities.

JBD
 
DiMitriR33 said:
a guy in my home town got sucked through a wood chipper.
he was working for a woman removing a fallen tree and never showed up to get paid, she called the police and they found a boot or some thing in the chipper. i wonder how she felt knowing that he was spread across her lawn in tiny little pieces? i think i'd move if that happened in my yard.

Ever hear how her grass did?  I'm betting "chopped dude" makes a good fertilizer.  Especially if he had a nitrate heavy diet. 
 
The newspaper headline would go something like this: 
"Man killed on area woman's lawn in woodchipper accident.  Lawn looks great."

I might just forget the whole guitar casket thing and join Chuck 7 in the low flying airplane over the highschool.  That sounds like a way to make a lasting impression.
 
David said:
The newspaper headline would go something like this: 
"Man killed on area woman's lawn in woodchipper accident.  Lawn looks great."

I might just forget the whole guitar casket thing and join Chuck 7 in the low flying airplane over the highschool.  That sounds like a way to make a lasting impression.

I agree-- I'm thinking I might go with the Chinook twin-rotor helicopter option for better coverage, though.

JBD
 
jackthehack said:
Your ashes won't fit in the control cavity; an averaged sized person will yield a tightly packed ash mass about the volume of a 6-pack of 16 oz.(.5 l) beer in cans. Need to plan on what to do with the rest, or build enough rear routes to hold all that.

Written as if you'd worked out the logistics of the hollowed out ashes holding option LONG ago. :)  Probably an extra $35. :)

 
taez555 said:
jackthehack said:
Your ashes won't fit in the control cavity; an averaged sized person will yield a tightly packed ash mass about the volume of a 6-pack of 16 oz.(.5 l) beer in cans. Need to plan on what to do with the rest, or build enough rear routes to hold all that.

Written as if you'd worked out the logistics of the hollowed out ashes holding option LONG ago. :)  Probably an extra $35. :)

Nope, have picked up ashes twice, so I know how much space they take up.

Given everything I've done since 1969 they should grind me up, put me in #00 gel caps and sell me at Ozzfest for $10/cap. The only worst waste of landscape than cemeteries are golf courses.
 
As a golfer, I can't agree, but I would be willing to help in land conservation by playing golf on a cemetery.  Just use those grave markers that are flush with the ground and they can double as yard markers. 

Something like:

                Bob Johnson
                1939 - 2003
  Beloved Husband and Father
221 yards to the front of the green
 
It would on a Thinline with no F-hole... send the ashes to Warmoth and have them built right into the body.  :icon_thumright:
 
Doing that might have side effects on the finished guitar  :laughing7:

Although it wasn't the greatest book (fiction), this guitar had the mojo of the original player.

http://www.amazon.com/Gutbucket-Quest-Piers-Anthony/dp/0812564863
 
chuck7 said:
Something like:

                Bob Johnson
                 1939 - 2003
   Beloved Husband and Father
221 yards to the front of the green

LOL, but the regular headstones would make a good hazard!  "Aw, crap-- I've knocked it into the Johnson family plot again...  I'll be in there forever."
 
Greatest thread!

I'd like to be sprinkled anywhere in the '60s. Time machine action.
Ooh, maybe in a '60s ES-335!



:doh:
 
Ok, how about rear routed guitar with both left and right handed control cavities.  I'm right handed, but the left handed cavity would be used to store my ashes, or as much of them as possible.  That way it would easy for my wife, or whoever outlives me, to plop me in there.
 
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