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A propos of nothing...fatherhood

erogenousjones17

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I'm gonna be a dad! Found out a couple of weeks ago that my girlfriend is pregnant. She's due in late January/early February. Yes, this is just me fishing for kudos.  :laughing7:

Also looking for tips from the other dads on here (you know who you are). This is going to be our first child; how do we go about staying sane/maintaining some semblance of a life?
 
Hey man,

There is no way to describe what you're getting yourself into.  It's a huge deal, but there are huge rewards.  Just hold on, get as much sleep as you can, keep your temper, always be there, and do the right thing all the time every time.  Easy... well, for a Dad that is  :)

Last week for the last day of school my oldest son grabbed me and told me that I had to, Just HAD TO come to his grade one class and play music.  It was all arranged with the teacher and I wrote a song specifically for it (about Pokemon and other stuff grade one kids like).  They LOVED IT. I was the hero of the week.  Kids (and parents) come up to me all the time asking to hear the song again.  That was just one cool thing in a years worth of cool things that happened.

If you're in any way normal, you'll love it.  and you'll be really really tired all the time.  :headbang:

 
Yes, rest when you can. Also don't be afraid to be selfish. That is if you need to take an hour for a run, bike ride, or guitar playing to stay sane, take it, and take turns with your girlfriend. That little kid needs you to be refreshed, ready and present. I always reference the airplane rule: put on your mask first, then put on the child's.

This was one of the hardest things for me to do. Once I did, everyone felt better. If you're crashing, the whole house will crash too.

Congratulations! If you though life was good, it's going to get better yet.
 
Congrats! I remember hearing people say the couldn't remember life before kids. i didn't realize it would take less than 6 months 
 
swarfrat said:
Congrats! I remember hearing people say the couldn't remember life before kids. i didn't realize it would take less than 6 HOURS


FTFY.  HTH.  HAND.
 
Thanks for the tips, guys. We're very excited, but also terrified. That seems to be the normal reaction. :laughing7:

We've also talked it over, and we're both big on the idea of letting ourselves have individual "me" time and shared "us time" without the kids. My parents never deprived themselves of that, and I think they were better parents for it. We also want to include our kids in the activities that are important to us. That includes creative things like painting (my gf is somewhat of an an artist) or guitar,* but also physical activities like hiking or yoga

But then again, we don't to fall into the trap of filling every second of every day with some sort of planned activity--kids need to be bored from time to time, so that they learn how to get themselves un-bored. You know, by being creative and using their imaginations and whatnot. You see so many families that are just completely burned out from running from one thing to the other every day.

It's crazy because it's still early, but my brain's been going a mile a minute since I found out with all the things we need to do, buy, build... Excitement!

*Definitely looking forward to jamming with my son or daughter. If I get them a drum kit, we can start a band!  :icon_biggrin:
 
Before you get too crazy thinking about what you're going to do together 15 years from now, you might want to consider if your washer/dryer is going to withstand the constant onslaught of laundry you're going to be doing, and the time it's going to take to do it. Also, no more quickie meals. Feeding time is going to eat your life. No quick pisses, either. You have to change a diaper. 14 times a day. You may want to consider wearing a diaper yourself, to save time.

RUN! RUN LIKE HELL, WHILE YOU STILL CAN! <grin>

Just kidding. You're going to have a blast. This is outside any experience you've ever had by a million miles.
 
Adding to the other responses out there... If you do this right, then your perception of yourself will change.  It's hard to describe, but you'll start thinking of yourself as more than just an individual, but also as a key link in a chain of people who are responsible for guiding and shaping a new life on the path to sentience and maturity.

More practically speaking, be ready to ask for and accept help from family members.  There are times when you'll both simply need a break.  A kind grandmother can be a great boon.
 
Haha Cagey. You got me. I have a tendancy to overthink things (and also to panic), so this is a perect opportunity for me. I'm already looking at universities. And I'm all stocked up on Depends. :icon_jokercolor:

My gf's parents live 15 minutes away and are fantastic (thankfully, none of the cliches about in-laws apply to me). We're very lucky.
 
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