Now THIS sucks!

[swarfrat]

Had to leave my 2 day old baby in the hospital yesterday with his momma because I felt flu like symptoms coming on. I don't get sick very often, and when I do I usually feel it coming on early. Left yesterday voluntarily within an hour of first achy/chills. Today it's full blown fever and I can't see my boy or be there to help my wife (went in for a scheduled c-section, got bumped by an emergency, ended up being emergency ourselves when my wife suffered a placenta abruption in front of the doctor.)

So after all the drama, mom and baby are doing well, but she can't pick up the baby, and I can't be there. Gaaaaaaaaah!!!! I was once an EMT, and PA is a life threatening emergency for both mom and baby.  We were scheduled a few weeks early, to keep her from going into labor. Thank God we were there when it happened. And thank God they're ok  - the emergency which bumped us was more like 26 weeks, and there's a red DND, No Visitors sign on one of the doors on our floor. I'm only guessing, but  I'm pretty sure I  know what it means. 

Sitting at home doped up on dayquil/nyquil and tamiflu, watching mythbusters and missing my family suddenly doesn't seem like such a big deal anymore. We've had several early losses, but a family member lost an essentially full term baby. I still remember it vividly myself, almost two decades later. I know they do too.  Go hug your kids. (As long as you don't have the flu, unless they're old enough or already sick themselves.) Then go hug your wife, even if you're not really getting along right now.  Maybe especially then. Pregnancy turned my wife from 'high maintenance' into ... uh ... really really really difficult.  To think I could have lost her, and our child, while in that state is gut wrenching.

 

[Xplorervoodoo]

And I thought 2 days of labor was hard to deal with....

Good luck dude.  From one father to another, I hope everything works out ok, and your family will be in your arms ASAP.

 

[bagman67]

Thinking the very most positive thoughts for you, your wife, and your little man.  My little girl spent two days in the neonate ICU when she arrived, and between my two sons, we had a mid-term loss. I feel for you.  Your decision to stay away is a wise one, but hard.  Modern medicine can do amazing things with preemies, and it sounds like you're in good hands.  Get well, because once momma and son get home, it's gonna be a while before you have time to get sick.


Welcome to the brotherhood of fatherhood. 


Ian

 

[TonyFlyingSquirrel]

Prayers for you and your family.

 

[swarfrat]

Just to clear up - our son wasn't a preemie. He was 8lb 12 oz at 37 weeks (and yes, we're  certain). He's healthy - healthy set of lungs (came out screaming). He had us concerned on day 2, but he's doing much better now that he's getting more to eat.

 

[bagman67]

Glad to hear it.  But being unable to cuddle the little piglet is still hard. 

 

[pabloman]

We too have had some pretty close calls with child birth. With kiddo #2 my wife had a uterine inversion, with #3 it was placental detachment, #4 was placental accreta. #5 would have been the same way but we were induced early to help avoid more complicaions. It's incredibly scary to see that much blood come out of someone. The kids were always relatively safe. It was wifey that was always in danger. Blood tranfusions and epi shots, It's all scary. As if child birth doesnt make a man feel useless enough as it is. Now years later we can joke about how our little demons killed mama. The morning we had our youngest one I logged in to start a NBD post and there was a member who had lost a child. I cried. I know I am blessed, my heart breaks and I question why were lucky when others were not. People will say things like its a test from god or god will only give you what you can handle. So does that mean I have my family because god knew I couldnt handle their loss? I am eternally grateful for all of the amazing medical staff that saved my wife. Through everything I wouldn't change a thing. My family is my world.

 

[Updown]

All my best wishes and a speedy recovery to yourself / wife and family  :icon_thumright:

Also a big congrats on the new addition  ccasion14:    I'm guessing it's your 1st born  :blob7:

My two girls are now 20yo & 22yo.
Oh man  :icon_scratch:  where did that time go  :dontknow:

 

[swarfrat]

Thanks. Yeah its our first. My baby sister's oldest is now 21, so yeah i know. Still remember the first time he went to sleep on my shoulder, and now he plays guitar better than I do. Being that much older now. I know the time will pass at a frightening pace.

 

[Maka491]

Sorry to hear than man and I hope you get better very soon!

My wife is expecting our second in April and I can only imagine how horrible it would be not to be able to be there with them.

Soon you will be able to cuddle your new-born though and as a father myself, I know that the bonding will start you will put all this behind you.

Hang in there!

 

[MikeW]

Congratulations! Wishing you and your family all the best.

Welcome to the brotherhood of fatherhood. 

This: +100.

 

[swarfrat]

Fever broke, Baby coming home today, but doctor still says 5-7 days... ugh. My son is going to think his dad is a bandit!

 

[Nando Vallart]

Sucks is a way light word to describe!
But I'm actually happy that everything is working on, I'm a little tired of watching things going wrong right now!

 

[m4rk0]

All the best to your child, your wife and yourself!! and congrats most of all!!!
Childbirth is so exciting and so scary at the same time!!

. Pregnancy turned my wife from 'high maintenance' into ... uh ... really really really difficult. 

I guess I was lucky.. my wife got really mellow both times.. last time we didn't even know until halfway, so that was extra lucky!

 

[swarfrat]

He came home Friday. Wifey started feeling sick too. Took him to his first pediatrician appointment Saturday morning, and noticed he was looking a bit yellow. (Note to new parents: We waited to find out the gender, which means we got lots of yellow & green clothes. We picked out this snazzy electric green stroller/car seat.  Even a little bit of jaundice looks absolutely horrifying when your baby is wearing yellow clothes, sitting in an electric yellow-green car seat).  We then took wifey to urgent care, but the pediatrician called with lab results and said when you're done, take him to ER (it was a saturday).  Didn't want him hanging out in UC waiting room, so I took him to the car and tried to feed him. He would stir, but not fully wake, even thumping the bottoms of his feet (painful stimuli), so I grabbed wife from Dr's office and high tailed it to ER, with call ahead seating.

He spent the night on the tanning bed, Eating better now (also critical for billirubin levels going down - it goes out either by poop or by pee (the light helps it go out as pee). We're getting discharged to go home now. Billi makes them sleepy, and he's a lazy eater, so it's a feedback loop. He eats now but I have to constantly agitate him - teasing the bottle away from him with one hand, and pinching him various places with the other.  The last stick for billirubin test he didn't wake up - so I was concerned again, but his numbers were good, and he's alert again - he was just exhausted from crying all freaking night long.

We're out of the woods now it looks like, and headed home.

 

[AutoBat]

Natural sunlight is also effective like a bili light.  I'm not sure of your climate, but if possible, trips outside would be helpful.

 

[swarfrat]

The one day he spent out of the hospital. Looked like we lived in Seattle. The bigger issue is hydration and  eating. Its not uncommon for breast fed babies ,before mom's milk comes in completely. He was getting even less nourishment than we thought. We have a handle on it now.

Common occurance, but yeesh. We were exhausted before this ever happened.

 

[Maka491]

It sounds like my first born, but let me assure you that most of the time you worry as naturally this is your first. So it's normal for you to be stressed about it but things will get better very very quickly.

Once again congratulations on the new baby and I hope you all three have a healthy long future.