Another Nigerian Scam

R

RLW

Guest
Dear Friends,

My name is Ndugood. I am a wealthy Nigerian prince who loves the jazz of music. I am seeking your help to move $200,000,000 from my checking
account here in Nigeria to the United States.

I too love the jazz of music and am planning to flee to America to open many jazz clubs at which I would like you to perform. You will receive $42,000 a night, plus a meal. My new "Tribal Village Vanguard" clubs will be of great success and you will become rich like the rest of American jazz musicians. I have already applied for building code exemptions to allow thatched stages and the spearing of live animals.

But I desperately need your help. My tribe, the Swindlisi, a peaceful jazz-loving people, has been horribly oppressed by the ruling military junta, which despises the jazz of music. My father, an exiled king and booking agent, was recently imprisoned under the Draconian "three gigs you're out" law. And now I must flee my beloved country with all of my improbable wealth. But I need help in moving it. I have so much money that it will not fit in the allotted two checked bags and one carry-on. I am therefore want to transfer the money through your ATM system. (The Nigerian ATM system cannot exchange international currencies; it only converts "antelope to money").

So please to just provide me with your full name and address, social security number, bank account and PIN numbers. And you will become incredibly (literally) rich from playing many jazz gigs. (Note: normal Nigerian Musician's Union rules apply: three hour performances, two 15 minute breaks allowed, musicians to provide their own mosquito nets, one open fire per bandstand, one free meal plus anything you kill).

Act now. The first ten musicians to respond will receive a free copy of the Nigeria's Greatest Jazz Hits CD, by our beloved 'Disoriented' Gillespie Band, which contains the hits:

The Night Has A Thousand Flies
Goodbye Shrunken Head
Here's That Rainy Season
Just Tribesmen (Lovers No More)
Take the 'A' Trail
When I Fall In Quicksand
Half-Nelson Mandella
Blue Monkey
Leopard Skins and Moonbeams
Blue Mombossa
Almost Like Being In Lagos
Sunny Side of the Goatpath
I Didn't Know What Century It Was

Thank you for your many help.

Your inordinately wealthy Nigerian brother,

Prince Ndugoo

(Stolen from The Gear Page...)
 

Steiger

Active member
Messages
86
This guy is clearly an antelope hunter by trade and wiped out an entire herd...

"The Nigerian ATM system cannot exchange international currencies; it only converts "antelope to money"."

But I do love

"I have so much money that it will not fit in the allotted two checked bags and one carry-on."



It sounds like a rogue jazz virus has taken over this guy....
 

line6man

Senior member
Messages
6,443
I especially like that he refers to jazz as "the jazz of music".

RLW, is this a real scam, or a joke?

I agree 100% with nathan a, sort of reminds me of Carlos Mencia's bit about in the wild, the stupid animals die.
 

NonsenseTele

Senior member
Messages
8,256
Two things:

1) I've discovered a while back: Don't matter how much weirdness you have seen, the thing will never end and always someone will break the record  :laughing7:

2) I would say some years ago: "it's not possible to have someone stupid enough to fall on this cr@p".... Now I think: Yes, I'm sure someone will...  :laughing3:
 
R

RLW

Guest
line6man said:
RLW, is this a real scam, or a joke?

Joke. "Disoriented Gillespie" should have given it away. You guys need to listen to less metal and more jazz.  :icon_biggrin:
 

nathan a

Senior member
Messages
1,836
RLW said:
line6man said:
RLW, is this a real scam, or a joke?

Joke. "Disoriented Gillespie" should have given it away. You guys need to listen to less metal and more jazz.  :icon_biggrin:

No I mean, I got the joke, Dizzy -> Disoriented.... I just really figure there are people out there dumb enough to fall for this, and so I assumed there really was someone out there trying to capitalize on that.
 

SkuttleFunk

Senior member
Messages
1,156
RLW - back away from that keyboard! I know you want to do it, man, but you can overcome your frailties and resist the urge to respond to that scam one more time

we're all pulling for you on this one, bro!

:icon_tongue:

R
 

tazwell minnit

New member
Messages
1
TO: RLW
FROM: Tazwell Minnit
    RLW, thank you for your support of my client Ndugood and for your faith in our enterprises. As a token of appreciation I am sending along one of our earlier offerings that might be of interest to you. Your friend, Tazwell.

Well friends, I'm on to my next endeavor, since my previous fund-raising campaign was less than fully successful [note to self-- never again use the phrase "no contribution is too small"].   
    I'll soon be releasing a 2 CD compilation set of classic recordings by my old cowboy jazz band, Rodeohead.  Here are the tunes:
        Disc One-- Relaxin' at Amarillo
                          Dear Old Stockyard
                          Hoofprints
                          Freddie the Freeranger
                          Goodbye Stetson Hat
                          I Can't Get Saddled
                          Lullabye of Midland
                          April in Paris, Texas
                          Freedom Barn Dance
                          I Remember Cleetus
                          One Goat Samba
                          Bewitched, Branded & Bewildered
                          Take the Hay Train

        Disc Two-- Chester Leaps In
                          Ruby, My Beer
                          Spring Can Really Hang You The Most
                          Quiet Fights In Quiet Bars
                          Up Jumped Slim
                          You Go To My Herd
                          Off Miner
                          That's Earp Brothers
                          Fables Of Festus
                          Darn That Jean
                          If I Were A Cowbell
                          Almost Like Being In Lubbock
                          Gentle Rein
                          A Pretty Mule Is Like A Melody
                          Gee Gabby, Ain't I Good To You

               
      *Special thanks to Corbis, Inc. for cover art photo
        of Doc and Billy Holiday.
      **Thanks to Columbia Publishing for rights to Rogers & Hart (Roy and Lorenz) materials.
      ***Vocalese by the OK Chorale courtesy of Verve Records, Inc.

Order your copies now! In keeping with Rodeohead's open source philosophy, fans are allowed to purchase the CDs for whatever amount they deem appropriate. No contribution over $29.99 is too small.
    Your pal, Tazwell.
         
 
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