DocNrock said:
I think it comes through. At Cagey's recommendation on my last one, I tried to leave a bit more open space on this one. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WimhoOAvMio
Nice! You hear how it has more of a "message" to it now? A good melody line is sorta conversant, for lack of a better term. Some parts run together, some are drawn out, sometimes you pause for effect, stuff like that. If you don't have those timing dynamics in there, it tends to sound monotonous.
For your next trick, you might add some diads and triads here and there for emphasis, which will improve the dynamics even more. Even with timing changes, a series of single notes still sounds like a series of single notes.